Pretty girls have problems too. Votes: 14
Hollywood's just not funny. Votes: 7
Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four. Votes: 0
Happy white peoples independence day the slaves weren't free but I'm sure they enjoyed fireworks. Votes: 0
Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars. Votes: 0
If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the game. Votes: 0
A black man will be elected President of the United States. I'm sorry, that's in the year 10,000. Votes: 0
My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. Oh my God, they're $4 million in the hole. Votes: 0
You can't fake comedy - it's not like a movie, where a director can just cast a pretty face. Votes: 0
The only plan I have is to not do anything I don't want to do - and to never work just for money. Votes: 0
You don't pay taxes; they take them from your check. That's not a payment - that's a 'jack. Votes: 0
I think it's better to have ideas. Votes: 0
Carol Leifer is funny, really funny. Votes: 0
The U.S government hates rap music Votes: 0
George Bush hates midgets. Votes: 0
Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous. Votes: 0
I do what I can do when I can do it. Votes: 0
Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men. Votes: 0
I can't even put gas in my plane! Votes: 0
You wonât be able to take your eyes off the next four presenters: Salma Hayek and Penelope Cruz. Votes: 0
I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house. Votes: 0
I think itâs better to have ideas. You can change an idea; changing a belief is trickier. Votes: 0
Community college is like a disco with books: "Here's ten dollars; let me get my learn on!" Votes: 0
I ain't shooting nobody, so call me a faggot. When the war's over, I'll be the faggot with two legs. Votes: 0
I believe you have my property! Votes: 0
I live way below my means. Votes: 0
I pride myself on being the guy who can do Def Comedy Jam and Charlie Rose. And do well on both. Votes: 0
It's easier to get on show business, the hard part is to maintain. Nobody stays famous forever. Votes: 0